


Just a Friendly Reminder: You're Gonna Die! - Jan 9, 2020

by Inky_moro



Series: Anno Uno Scribere [57]
Category: Original Work, Unus Annus - Fandom
Genre: Anno Uno Scribere, Memento mori, Unus Annus, radio show au?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-10
Updated: 2021-01-10
Packaged: 2021-03-14 01:42:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 643
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28663389
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Inky_moro/pseuds/Inky_moro
Summary: Based on the end of We Took an IQ Test
Series: Anno Uno Scribere [57]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2016157
Kudos: 1





	Just a Friendly Reminder: You're Gonna Die! - Jan 9, 2020

“Hello Everyone!  
“Thank you for tuning in today!  
“As you are probably well aware of, the new year began a bit more than a week ago, and it already looks like 2021 is going to shit. Now, this doesn’t mean that the rest of the year is going to be at a similar or worse level of shittiness, but this is hardly ‘starting the year off right’. We may be looking at a new decade, the terrible 2020s. Which sounds just awesome! Don’t you think?

“Well anyway, we’d like to give you all a friendly reminder that you are going to die today!

“Wait what-

“OOPS- um I meant to say ‘one day’, so so sorry guys

“You probably gave a few listeners heart attacks

“Well then that means that I was right- the listeners are dying today

“NO! No- dude no, they’re not going to die today- I mean some of them might, but

“Exactly- some of our listeners could die today, some of them could die tomorrow, some of them could die Monday  
“The point is, dear listeners, that one day you will end up dead as a doornail- whether that’s because of covid-19, a hurricane, a tornado, a car accident, falling through ice and drowning, somehow getting on the bad side of a mob or mafia family or whatever those things are called, the fbi or illuminati or some sort of weird government cult deciding you know to much, getting shot at a protest or something because most if not all governments absolutely loathe minorities-

“Okay okay okay! If you don’t slow down there and shut your gods-damned mouth we will end up being shot by the government-

“Good point- sorry about that

“What my co-host is trying to say is that you could die at anytime, death is like a cobra or an invisible giant poisonous spider- you never know when it’s gonna strike and take you to…

“Whatever afterlife you believe exists, dear listener

“Yeah okay, veering away from that topic- you have to make the most of the time you have, because you never know when that time will run out and you suddenly won’t have the chance to do everything you wanted to 

“That’s why it's probably a good idea to have a bucket list

“But if you tell people about the bucket list, they might think you’re going to die soon

“I mean, you could die at any moment, but telling people would probably stress them out and take a few years off their lives- so maybe that’s not such a good idea

“Why do people even have bucket lists- like, when did that become a thing?? And why is it called a bucket list, anyway? Did someone just have a bucket and… I don’t even know, what would you do if you had a random bucket?

“Put stuff in it? I don’t know man, what are buckets used for usually

“I believe they have a variety of practical uses, they can hold food, water, small objects- or large ones, depending on the size of the bucket. Buckets can also be used as great makeshift helmets if you’re short on time and in need of armor-

“Are you getting this from wikipedia or something??

“I mean, I totally get how a bucket can be used as a helmet, but what about the other armor pieces?

“Are you even listening to me-

“You could cut out the bottom of a small barrel and make little arm gauntlet thingies

“Excuse me-

“Oh! And you could make little leg thingies the same way-

“Okay guys, I don’t think I’m gonna get them off this bucket monologue anytime soon-

“The one issue is how to make a chest piece out of bucket-

“ANyway, have a great day listeners!

“You would need a ReAlLy BiG bUcKeT-

“Remember, You’re gonna die!

**Author's Note:**

> this is the longest one of these has been in a while- I feel proud :))
> 
> Apparently the Electra Heart album is my writing music-


End file.
